Welcome!

This is about the journey. I write to maintain my focus and stay disciplined to the way, the path I follow.

First, I have to admit that I am an addict! I’m addicted to my past and what I perceive my future. I’m addicted to my patterned, repetitive behaviors that I have perfected over the last 67 years. I’m addicted to the illusions I am bound to which I have difficulty to letting go of for fear of what I am not sure. I am addicted to grasping for that which I tell myself will make me better or complete or whole. This usually comes in the form of seeking approval or pleasure or reassurance. It comes in the form of believing I need more than I will truly ever use. I comes in so many forms and ways that it seems impossible to deal with at times.

I am addicted to avoidance. I want to avoid the painful or unpleasant things in life. I want to avoid writing about these things. I want to avoid people and situations that make me uncomfortable. I want to avoid the honest self-reflection necessary to understand and find peace with my demons. I want to avoid the acceptance of myself.

Here I will monitor my path. I will pay attention to the signs on the trail. I will do my best to make sense of my life. I am ready to be untethered!

 

10.22.17 – Update